wait not

215dDsiqA9L

Wrinkled scarred palm

Holding Scrabble squares

That spell “wait not.”

I sure understand

The message is so loud

In its calm manner of delivery,

And yet I don’t listen.

I watch stars in her loose hair

Falling down

Figures in her tattooed hands

Come alive,

They seem to care

To shake hands with me,

And yet they are of life

So far away from me,

In the world where I can never tread

Unless in sleep.

I dream as I walk,

Perhaps still waiting for the right

Moment? Person? Word?

Perhaps I care too much

To think what will be and how,

And on what terms,

And how much work is to be put forth.

I must be lazy.

Or maybe I’m afraid of something.

I wait, as I watch

The wind bringing yellow leaves again.


the image was copied from https://www.google.ca/search?biw=1366&bih=625&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=SFRYXcnzBsSv-gTj56bICA&q=scrabble+w&oq=scrabble+w&gs_l=img.3..35i39j0l9.16587.18437..20028…0.0..0.99.677.8……0….1..gws-wiz-img…….0i67.LVPNcyDY-5Q&ved=0ahUKEwjJt6Xg0IrkAhXEl54KHeOzCYkQ4dUDCAY&uact=5#imgrc=l1y__OIlfDm3vM: and maraudered by me. thanks.

Veiled Opportunities

notexitThere are all these signs. On the walls, on buses, on TV, in the papers. Some good ones, some better ones, some crappy and misleading. And many deep ones, many that make you think and wonder. I saw a new one at the work place weeks back.

“Things don’t happen to you. Things happen for you.”

Talk about deep ones, hey. How does that wise vase work?

Crap happens. Loss takes over. Tragedies crawl in and linger. Abuse of all that feels good and/or should stand strong and untouched breaks through and demoralizes. The dark suffocates the light and there seems to be either no end of misery or no sense of why would it ever happen, whether to the good people, or to the people in general.

Really, why? Well, hell knows, someone would say. Shit just happens. Or…

One very smart, but not very happy German said once “what doesn’t kill me makes me stronger.” Then a fictional villain extraordinaire paraphrased: “what doesn’t kill you simply makes you… stranger.” But whoever posted the “happen for you” sign was way ahead of these two, or simply learned from them. Isn’t it more smart to be positive about things that wallow in infinite grieving and self-pity? Yes, grieving is important, but to keep swimming in the black lake, never allowing yourself to come on shore? I don’t think so.

So… things don’t happen to you. OK, I understand that some things do happen to you, disasters and death of loves ones, that seems too much and too great to see anything positive in, but still… things happen for you. To overcome. To learn something. Maybe not right away, because the pain is too much. Yet still, you and I and them, we learn how not to give up, how to stay on and not exit, how to cope, and a mass of time may pass and then we look back…

Yes, we look back and we see the wisdom, sometimes harsh truth, but if we take it for what we saw it before, that sharp punch of doom that knows no mercy, then we will learn nothing but that gods hate us. And if we did try to overcome, if we wanted it, and we looked for a better time, if we (important word) allowed us to have a better time for ourselves, then we will see the things for what they are, the possibly veiled opportunity to benefit from. And we will learn even better. From a mistake, or from a tragedy that wasn’t caused by us, or from a strange event that made no sense, and we will move on. And we may get way better. The crap that happened has done so for our good. I know you don’t like that perspective. I used to dislike it a lot, and who knows what else is coming my way. And yet, it is usually all good. I just have to give it time to see it in a different light.


the front image was copied from https://www.homedepot.com/p/12-in-X-8-in-Plastic-Not-An-Exit-Sign-PSE-0091/206873504 and altered by me. thank you